• *hears noises at night*: well this is it this is the end for me I had a good life
  • *gets shampoo in my eyes*: I guess I'm blind now how am I ever going to see my first born child
  • *heart is beating fast*: I think I am having a heart attack is this what cardiac arrest is
  • *a cop walks by*: here I go about to get arrested I probably murdered someone
  • *taking a test*: don't take your eyes off of this paper you will get caught cheating and get kicked out of school and amount to nothing
  • *gets a sunburn*: great now I have skin cancer how will I tell my parents
  • *tripping over something*: I guess my leg will have to be amputated why did this happen to me
  • *period is late*: shit i'm pregnant i'm the next virgin mary
786,196 notes

meanplastic:

psyducked:

one time my sister walked in on my fingering myself so I told her that I was checking my prostate because I was feeling sick and I was afraid I had cancer and we spent a good 15 minutes hugging each other crying

image

(via easy-breezy-beautiful-pubic-hair)

139,331 notes

belllaavitaaa:

I don’t know how some girls are 100% straight like have you seen girls

(via g-dragons-ass)

432,740 notes